I'll Catch You Before You Kill Me
by Luvmehatemewantme
Summary: OCXLIGHT    I do NOT own Death Note
1. Chapter 1

[1] One [1]

You know that girl with choppy red hair, don't look like she's had sleep for ages, she hates wearing shoes, and she always has to have a source of sugar on her? You know her; she has the really dark coloured eyes and she looks Japanese but is obviously English from the shape of her eyes. You could mistake her for Sherlock Holmes for her great observing skills and logical thinking, but really she's as blonde as they come (meaning she's a red head). Well, that's me. I'm Ella Smith. Half Japanese half English. I've lived in England since birth and I've been brought up by my mother Julia Smith and her husband Ray. I don't know my biological father, but that doesn't bother me because Ray is my dad, he was the one that looked after mother and me. I have a younger half-brother called Ryan, he's sweet, and he's turned eight and has his dads blue eyes and golden hair. Apparently I have an older half-brother too, mum said I did because my father had a son, about five, making him about twenty-one because I'm only sixteen. I turned sixteen in July. Sweet sixteen never been kissed as they say, I apparently look like my brother a lot too and act like him. But what does mum know? She was only with my father for a month whilst she was doing business in Japan, she was sure happy enough to leave him when she had to be elsewhere. Then, after a month or two, she found she was pregnant with me, 'Oh Joy', just when she was starting to date this nice lad she liked. He didn't mind he was in love (this is Ray I'm talking about), sure he lived in a nice pad in New York, but he had businesses everywhere in his Men's and Women's clothing line, even in Japan believe it or not! So, moving to England to help the love of your life raise a kid that wasn't your own seemed a minor thing to him. Eight years down the line the couple decided to have a kid of their own, sweet little Ryan. But when I say 'I'm daddy's little girl' I do mean it, because Ryan is my dad and I'm his daughter. Although, every Christmas and birthday, I got a present of my real dad.

I don't know why I'm writing this to be honest; I guess I feel like I have something to say, which I do, but why go on about it to you. You're not interested now, are you? If you are, that's fine by me, go ahead and read, I'm not promising this is going to be good, because it's not, got it? I'm not a good writer, although my grades say otherwise, but let's not get into that.

So, on this fine rainy day I sit inside on my old chair I use to read on, with a copy of Sherlock Holmes, bare footed, with a coca-cola lollypop in my mouth (we didn't have any strawberry ones). Mum says I stay in my room too much, I say I couldn't care less. The world is too stupid for the likes of me, seeing it in person makes me believe it more. Now, Sherlock is on my level, if you're not like Sherlock, you're not that good to be honest and I'm not particularly bothered in your life story or anything to do with you.

"Ella, dinner is ready," mum called up.

We may be rich because of Ryan's wealth, but mum comes from a hardworking background and loves to do the housewife role by cooking, cleaning, etc... You know the boring stuff in life. So, if I say the food is rubbish, it's not the matter of firing the chef and getting a better one. Mum's stuff likes to...burn, or explode, or just turns out unpalatable. Don't tell her I said that, okay? She just thinks I'm just not a big eater (she hasn't seen all the cakes and sweets I eat).

"No thanks, I'm content with my lollypop," I called back.

"ELLA! You can't live on lollypops, come down and eat some dinner!"

If I don't come back, blame mum ENTIRELY!

I've got the sweetest tooth in the house, I eat sweets 24/7 and if I don't, I feel deprived, my brain starts to whirl, my behaviour goes from one extreme to the next and then I collapse and cry. Eventually, mum lets me have sweets and I go back to normal. The doctors say that they don't know what's wrong with me, but I don't think it bothers them, I don't have any cavities, I'm in perfect health, and I'm top of the class. I also have mild OCD; everything has to be in order, I can spend hours arranging my DVD'S, CD'S and Books, in alphabetical order or by colour, I'm not sure whether this counts but, I also like to stack things.

"I don't like spaghetti," I stated as I sat down at the table.

"Just eat some," said my mother.

"Can I have lemon meringue instead?" I ask, stabbing the worm-like pasta with my fork.

"Eat some pasta Ella," said Ray, "Then you can have some Cherry Bakewell."

"But I don't want cherry Bakewell," I mumbled.

"Mum, I don't want pasta either!" Said my eight year old brother – who loves pasta.

"Yes, you do, now eat – both of you."

I sit there quietly, pushing my food around the plate and by the time everyone else is done my food is cold and mum gives up with me. She cuts up the bakewell and like always, I carry it to my room to eat as I read my Sherlock Holmes book.

I must have fallen asleep at some point because I suddenly jolted up as I heard mum shouting. At first I thought her and Ray was arguing or that Ryan had done something wrong, but it wasn't that sort of shouting, and it was midnight.

"I demand to see her," a man's voice said.

"You and your father have gone long enough knowing she doesn't exist, why do you need her now?"

"I want to see her," the man's voice said, "I've went so long without siblings, I just want to see what she is like."

"You can't see her! I shall not allow it, and if you are sent by your father to retrieve her, tell him to stick it!"

"Father died the Christmas after you had left."

"Why are you saying it like that? It's not my fault!"

"Does my sister even know about her father?" Asked the man.

"She knows what she needs to."

"So she doesn't know that he's dead?"

I stormed out my room and downstairs, "Will you all just shut the hell up!"

That's when I saw him, my older half-brother. The same choppy, unruly hair, dark bags under his eyes, and he stared at me with wide eyes.

"Ella," my mother said taking me by the shoulder and trying to direct me back upstairs, I shrugged away from her.

"You said my father was alive, them presents I got of him; they were from you, weren't they?" I asked.

"I just didn't want you to feel like your father didn't care, I did tell him about being pregnant with you, and I was honest with you from the start (I didn't know he was dead), I just wanted you to feel like you had a real father," she said.

"You know mum, you're really stupid. I was always happy with having Ray as my father," I admitted, "I didn't care about the Japanese bloke that sent me Japanese toys for my birthday and Christmas. I wouldn't have cared. But now I do care, because you lied."

I then turned to my brother, "I'm sorry, but it would have been better if you didn't come," I said.

I went to the kitchen then walked back in, with a handful of sugar cubes, to see that mother and my brother were still standing in silence.

"Well, I'm off to bed, mum be a good hostess, set up the sofa-bed."

My brother shook his head, "I'm staying at a hotel."

[i] What the hell? Why did he have to bloody come? [/i] I shrugged popping a sugar cube into my mouth, "I want explanations in the morning. Both of you."

[i] Even if I have to force it out of them. [/i]


	2. Chapter 2

[2] Two [2]

I'm often told that I look like I've just got out of bed but not had enough sleep. I would have enough sleep if it wasn't for all the things whirling about in my head, constantly annoying me to the extent not even I can straighten them out. My messy 'bed-head' is absolutely natural; I guess it just grows out my head in that way. I've had it styled a few times but that just made it worse so it's all the way down to my butt. Also, no matter how many times I brush it, it looks the same, minus the knots. Don't even get me started on shoes...

I'm Ella by the way (just in case you had forgotten).

There's a routine I have when it comes to waking up. It goes a little like this: Wake up, stare at ceiling, count to one hundred, get out of bed, have a shower, brush my teeth, get washed, have a big cup of coffee, with about five-eight sugar cubes (the more the better).

I turned around from the sugar bowl. "You're here then," I said taking a long sip from my coffee before adding more sugar cubes.

He continued stirring his coffee before lifting the spoon out and sucking the dregs off it. "You told me to be, and I wanted to see you," he said raising an eyebrow, "Plus I wanted to apologize. I shouldn't have just barged in and demanded to see you. I admit, it was extremely impolite of me."

I shrugged, "It gave me an excuse to get some sugar cubes."

"That proves you're my sister than," he said.

"What? My love for sugar? Because I honestly thought it was the bags under my eyes."

"Wow, really must be an inherited thing; I can't really remember my father much."

"Hm, really?" I took another long sip of my coffee and then added more sugar, "I always thought he was alive." I pulled out the chair across from him and sat down. "Now, are you going to tell me why you came here and tell me the truth, or not?"

"I came here to see you," he said, "I recently found out I had a sister, and I wanted to see you. I did call your mother earlier on, obviously she didn't tell you and I'm a quick thinker and I gathered she was giving you the whole 'your real dad is alive and loves you' scenario. I'm guessing she also told you that she fell in love with our dad but she had to return to England."

"How did you know?"

"It's a lie. I've lived in England since I was ten, until I was five I lived with my father," he explained, "your mother was my father's personal assistant, she played with his mind, soon she found she was pregnant and ran away, to find your stepfather Ray, she decided she'll settle down. No offence, but your mum's a whore."

"I know."

"How do you know?"

"I saw her with a man, I was about six," I said, "I guess you can say I've never been interested in men since. They call it sexual trauma or something, right?"

He nodded, "Something along those lines."

"May I ask for your name?"

"You can call me L."

"Ella."

"Nice coincidence," he said.

"Tell me Ella, what are your investigations skills like?"

"Well, if I say I can tell L isn't your real name, you look like you're not used to randomly showing your face to people, and that you too must be a great detective because you said you didn't know you had a sibling yet you discovered me," I replied, "I'm not up to your standard let alone Sherlock Holmes."

"But quite good. Would you like to come to Japan with me?"

"I only just met you, brother."

"It'll be a great way to get to know each other," he shrugged.

"Mum won't allow it."

"Your mother lied to you. Plus, wouldn't you like to get away? I can get you into a good school."

"Ah, so it's only temporary," I said sarcastically.

"Yes, so, do you want to come?"

"Yeah, why not."

I gulped down the last of the coffee and place my cup into the sink. "I'll be right back; I've got to pack my bag."

"I'll be waiting."

"I can't believe I just left," I said – whilst thumping in 'I'm going to Japan see you whenever' into my mobile and sending it to mum. I looked up to see three other people in the car: the driver, a boy and a girl.

"Hey! I'm Ella," I said.

"Light," said the boy with light-brown hair and mysterious eyes.

"Misa," said the girl. I held her gaze for a moment. She looked confused, and she kept glancing at Light with that 'loved-up' gaze.

"Watari," said the driver.

I nodded. It's not like I lack any self confidence, I just find people, boring – which explains why I have absolutely no friends. I pulled my laptop case onto my lap and looked into one of my sections for my eBook. [i] 'on glancing over my notes of the seventy odd cases in which I have during the last eight years studied the methods of my friend Sherlock Holmes, I find many tragic, some comic, a large number merely strange, but none common place...' [/i] I looked up from the screen to see them staring (except Watari because he was obviously looking at the road). "Why are you staring at me...?" I asked.

L and Misa looked away but Light held his gaze at me and I returned it. This boy is planning something, something big, and is keeping it a secret, others might not see it but there's an evil glint in his eyes, like he's murdered already... The pearly whites of his eyes were so shockingly bright and shocking cruel and the iris was almost invisible and hidden by the dark black of his pupil that reflected everything bad in the world. Was he planning something? His eyes quickly turned to L and then back to me. Was he planning L's murder? Well that decided it.

"I don't think we're going to get on," I said bluntly. L looked up at me with a shocked expression and Misa turned and glared, "And I'm surprised you're bubble-headed – I'm guessing model by the way she's dressed – girlfriend even understands English, surely she's not that academic?"

I then cursed in German (I curse in different languages because mother and Ray are not linguistic so don't understand what I'm saying, so I do not get in trouble), "I forgotten the lollypops."

"You can tell that you and L are kindred spirits," laughed Light, "Don't worry, L has a whole stash."

I laughed along, he wouldn't be laughing if I didn't have any lollypops...I get cranky...Hulk cranky...


	3. Chapter 3

[3] Three [3]

I [s] hate [/s] dislike aeroplanes. They jolt you about and shake you until your insides spill and all in all, this was my first time in one and it was an eleven hour flight! I had earache most of the time and spent a lot of the time was a sick bag – which I christened.

I vomited into the bag then looked up and wiped my chin with my sleeve, gross I know but I had no tissue on me. "How can you like planes?" I asked before heading back to the sick bag.

L shrugged, "I don't, I can't sit comfortably, but I guess my stomach is not as sensitive as yours."

I looked up from the sick bag, "I think I need a new one."

L grimaced.

Half of the flight was over with and I was getting used to the gentle jolts and the movement of the mechanical bird. I was sitting by myself by now because L decided he wanted to talk to Light and Misa. I got up and walked over to L. Misa looked up from her magazine and smiled. "You are feeling okay now?"

"Yeah, thanks," I replied in Japanese.

"Yay! I can speak an easy language!" Celebrated Misa in her native tongue...Didn't I say something about bubble-headed a minute or so ago? I sat down next to L who was speaking rapidly to Light – who was taking it all in.

"Oh, hey Ella," Light said. L stopped talking and turned to me with a smile.

Suddenly a lollypop popped up in front of my face making me go crossed eyed.

"Do you want one?" L asked.

I smiled and popped the lollypop in my mouth and took possession of the stick. "I'm happy now." I then saw something, a piece of paper, on the table, "What are you doing?"

"Discussing the Kira case," said L.

"Oh, cool, explain please."

And this is the Kira case: Lately criminals have been dropping like flies around Japan, L and other cops are trying to find out who's causing them and to stop it. L thinks Misa and Light are behind it all and that is why they're with us. Light is currently helping L catch Kira even though he's a suspect. Now, so far there has been two Kiras. The first Kira and the second Kira. The first one needed a name and face to kill; the second one just needed a face. Its L's job to create justice and lock both Kiras behind bars. And of course, they'd be sentenced to death.

I stared at Light all the way through this and he held my gaze.

"I think your right in suspecting Light," I said. I twirled my lollypop in my mouth and got up. "Do you know where the toilet is?"

"I'll show you," said Light getting up, "I need to go too so it makes sense."

I looked at him weird.

"There are two cubicles."

"I knew that."

He led me to the cubicle. As I went to open the door he held it shut with his hand his arm just skimming against my face.

"I don't understand why you think I'm kira," he said.

"Can you see yourself right now?"

He pulled back his arm and looked apologetically at me, "Sorry. I just don't like being accused of something I didn't do. Look, Ella, just don't tell L about this okay." He picked up a strand of my hair and twirled it around his finger.

Was this him trying to seduce me to keep quite? I pushed him back with the palm of my hand, "You've known me for less than seven hours; don't try to convince me this way I'm not stupid like Misa."

"No, of course you are not," he said, "You're extremely smart and extremely cute although you're probably not got the innocence."

"No, I have not got the 'innocence' I know all about 'it' but I am not a slut that throughs herself onto people; now if you don't mind, I need to pee."

I turned my back on Light and walked into the cubicle. Locking it quickly, I sank back against the door, my heart was pounding. I put my hand to it, it was more than pounding, and it was racing! Anyway, I needed to pee and I couldn't hold it in any longer, I did what I had to do, and washed my hands. Walking out I adjusted my slacks, so they fell of my hips better and pulled my top straight. Light was there waiting.

"Light, you didn't need to wait for me," I said.

He shrugged, "I just wanted to make sure –"

"That I'd keep quite? Look, if you're that bothered about it I will."

"See, you like me really," he said with a smiled.

"Get lost."

Now, as you can expect from a ten to twelve hour flight, I was tired as hell and suffered from jetlag.

I couldn't even remember where I was. I was just shown the bedroom and fell into a deep sleep onto the bed and woke up to a vibrating in my jean pocket.

I rolled over and groaned, pulling my mobile out and flipping it open. Once it was to my ear I said: "Hello?" And the conversation started.

"Where the hell are you?"

"Japan."

"What are you doing in Japan?"

"Sight-seeing."

"Do you know how worried we are?"

"Not worried enough to let me sleep mum just calm down, I'll come home eventually and to be honest, you're in no situation to tell me what to do; I know everything."

She went quite.

"Just be safe," she said.

"You know I will I'm the safest girl around when I'm not falling off stuff."

"That's because you have my bad sense of balance. Just be okay? Ok?"

"Yeah, I know, Love you, bye."

"Bye my darling. Be safe and I want to hear from you everyday –" I flipped the phone shut and then took out the battery. [i] I don't want to hear from her every day. [/i]


	4. Chapter 4

[4] Four [4]

I woke up around morning time. The sun was – there weren't any windows to be honest, so I couldn't see the sun, but my watch definitely said ten am (L changed it for me whilst we were still on the plane). I yawned and stretched and ran my fingers through my knotty hair.

"I fancy some sugar puffs," I muttered. "Do they even have them over here?"

I shrugged. My suitcase was still full with my clothes so I hauled it onto the bed and unzipped it. Underwear, black bra and pants and blue and black striped socks, check. Top, electric blue tight crewneck, check. Trousers, black skinny jeans, check. Accessories, blue belt, check. Usually I don't care what I wear but, I don't know, maybe I just wanted to look a little bit better today without having to take the labels of the skirts mum brought ages ago – which I packed just in case I felt like wearing one. I eventually found a bathroom and went and washed and changed. You know the drill.

My hair, I hate it, and that's coming from someone who isn't vain. I did my best with it and pulled it back into a high pony and left my fringe down. I broke about two bobbles in the process but I managed it.

Make-up? Who needs it? I saw mum slapping it on when I was little and she just looked like a tart, I decided I wasn't going to be vain like that. Ray says I'm beautiful enough and my mother is beautiful enough without make-up. For a modern guy he's quite old fashioned.

Before I left my enclosure I pulled on my black converse then though against it – isn't wearing shoes inside unheard of in Japan? Something like that anyway. So, to be safe, I kept them off.

"Hello," I said as I walked into the room everyone was gathered in. "Oh, new people. L, where's the kitchen?"

"Just ask Watari to get you something," replied L.

"Watari is not a servant, L. Plus; I wanted to check out what stock you've got in."

L turned and raised an eyebrow, "You can do if you want but I don't see the point, we'll probably have what you want it."

I huffed and sat down onto a plush chair and raised my knees and tucked them under my chin.

"What would you like Miss Smith?" Asked the ageing man.

"Sugar puffs with extra sugar," I replied, "If you don't mind."

His eyes twinkled, "Of course not. You're just like you're brother you know."

"I know."

Light walked in just as Watari left with a towel on his head, attempting to dry his saturated crop of hair. "Anything new happened?" He asked the newest men I saw.

"Nothing yet, son," said the elder man.

Light nodded then caught sight of me. "Hey Ella, did you have a nice sleep?"

"Until I woke up, yes," Watari came in with a bowl of cereals and a spoon, "Thank you Watari."

The men started talking again and I listened intently. To me, they were going about this the wrong way, and there was a possibility that they overlooked.

"You're not _that_ smart are you?" I put down my bowl and walked over to them, "If Kira is as 'powerful' and 'mystical' and 'god-like' as he says he is he'd know how to get past you sleuths. Say, he can decide when the person dies, if he knows he's going to get locked up – to prove he's not Kira, Oh hello Light – then he can write down names of current criminals he was saving for an occasion like this."

"But there were criminals dead that were only convicted when he was enclosed in a cell," said Light.

"Well then, you're smart enough to pass on your power to someone else, are you not? And you'd make sure it was someone who was greedy and power-hungry."

"I know what you're getting at but I don't understand why you and L both suspect me of being Kira."

"Because you are 25% more evil than any man in this room."

"Now how do you know that?"

"Eyes betray a person my friend, if I was you I'd go to the doctor and ask him about that twitch in your right eye; anyone would have thought you was angry at something or someone."

"Honestly, tell me, is something mentally wrong with you?" asked Light spitefully.

I smirked and replied: "Nothing wrong with me that a few tablets won't cure."

Everyone in the room was staring at us as we glared at each other. He was Kira, I just know it, and I think L suspects him too. Unlike others I rely more upon a person's body behaviour, nervous habits, etc, to work out stuff like this. Light is too calm when being suspected, his smile is always a smirk of detest, his voice is always dripping with 'Thanks for giving me the next clue to what you're going to do on the Kira case, I'll make sure I change the strategy when I go to kill my next victim'.

"Where's your blonde-bimbo?" I asked.

"If you mean Misa she's in her room," he replied curtly.

"I have a feeling she's the type of girl that would screw you over as long as it made 'you' happy to make 'her' happy. I bet you enjoy yourself."

"I'm not that kind of man," he said.

"No," sarcasm dripping in my words, "Of course your not."

I walked straight past him and back to where my room was, "I'm going to pack my stuff – I take it that was my room." I left before any of them could reply.

I closed the door behind me and screamed and punched the wall. Why am I being like this? I'm not a sociable person but neither am I rude! And why is my heart pounding violently whenever he enters the room? Do I hate him that much? No, no it's not that. So, what is it?


	5. Chapter 5

[5] Five [5]

I sat crossed legged on my bed reading my copy of Agatha Christie's Poirot on my eBook. Already half-way through it I decided to take a brake and find a snack. It's been a good four hours since breakfast. I know, I'm a pretty sad girl for staying in my room reading for four hours, let's just say an Agatha Christie book is very enticing.

I yawned and climbed of the bed and went exploring. I was going to find the kitchen...

I walked into one room and then back out again. My heart started racing again. I pressed my heart against it and felt the rhythmic pulse. The door creaked open and I turned around.

"What's up Ella?"

I turned, "Hi Light. Sorry about walking in." I said.

My face felt like it was burning and Light looked at me with an amused smile. He gently prodded my cheek, "You're as red as a tomato," he laughed. He was still topless and had his shirt in his hand.

'He's a boy god-damn-it! I should be like this! He's just a boy!' But he was a nice boy. He was perfectly structured and I was really tempted to run my hand down his chest.

"Don't worry about that, could've happened to anyone right?" He said pushing back a strand of my hair.

"Yeah, could've happened to anyone, but it had to happen to me," I said.

He smiled gently and his eyes seemed glazed over as he stared at me and I couldn't help noticing his head leaning further near me. His hand was still by my head from where he had pushed back my hair. His lips lingered near mine and his warm breath tickled my face. But then his fist curled into a ball and he pulled away with a chuckle.

"I'm sorry, it's just, you looked cute blushing," he said.

I gave a fake laugh, "Could've happened to any guy, right?"

"Yeah, could've happened to any guy, but it happened to me."

I stepped back awkwardly, "Maybe I should go."

"Maybe."

I started backing away with a short wave and a smile before sprinting away.

Awkwardness - awk·ward

–_**adjective**_

**1.**

Lacking skill or dexterity; clumsy.

**2.**

Lacking grace or ease in movement: _an awkward gesture; anawkward dancer._

**3.**

Lacking social graces or manners: _a simple, awkward frontiersman._

**4.**

Not well planned or designed for easy or effective use: _anawkward instrument; an awkward method._

**5.**

Requiring caution; somewhat hazardous; dangerous: _anawkward turn in the road._

**6.**

Hard to deal with; difficult; requiring skill, tact, or the like: _anawkward situation; an awkward customer._

**7.**

Embarrassing or inconvenient; caused by lack of social grace: _an awkward moment_

**8.**

_Obsolete. _Untoward; perverse.

Well, that's what I got when I looked on: .com. I think, in this case, its number seven: Embarrassing or inconvenient; caused by lack of social grace: an awkward moment.

And this is what I felt when I sat in the same room as Light that evening.

"Are you two alright?" Asked L. "I know you're not on the best of terms but I'd have thought you'd at least be at each other's throats."

I stared at my striped socks and burrowed my eyebrow. "I was looking for the kitchen earlier today, I couldn't find it."

"Light knows where it is," said L, "He's quite a cook you know. Makes the sweetest meringues known to man."

"Oo, I love meringues," I said hopefully with a big smile, "Can you make me one? I tried but I forgot to add the lemon curd bit..."

"How can you forget that bit?" Laughed L.

"Easily," I replied with a distant frown as I remembered that horrible day.

"I'll make you one," said Light, "I'll cook you a cake everyday if you want."

L frowned, "Why don't you do that for me?"

"Because you're not Ella."

I smiled shyly and looked over at L. Maybe he isn't that bad? No, no deffinately not, I know he's bad. I shall not be convinced that he's an innocent man by making me... No I'm not even falling in... I shan't even say the word. Why should I if I don't feel it?

Of course I'm not in love.

"Let me take you to the kitchen and I'll make one for you," Light said quickly and hopefully.

I looked over at my brother – who shrugged and went back to stacking sugar cubes .

I smiled, "That'd be nice."

I sat on a stool and popped sugar cubes in my mouth as I watched Light whisk his magic in the kitchen.

"So what's the relationship like between you and Misa, you are dating right?"

"I'm not dating her, no, but she's convinced she loves me," he replied as he whisked away, bearing a frown on his face.

"I feel sorry for you," I said, "Is she really as blonde as she looks?"

He shrugged, "I don't stay around her long enough to find out."

I laughed lightly.

"Why are you being so friendly around me all of a sudden?" He suddenly asked.

"I've decided you're only 15% eviler than everyone else that was here," I said popping another sugar cube in my mouth, "I don't suspect you any less."

"That will make our relationship all the more interesting."

"Wait – our what?"

He was suddenly standing next to me and had his lips pressed against mine. His hand was at the back of my head pushing me deeper into the kiss and I found myself relaxing and sinking into his warm embrace, even wrapping my arms around his neck. He deepened the kiss and our lips moved in synch. His lips tasted bitter and sweet.

What the hell was I doing? Am I an idiot? But it felt so good.

I could hear church bells and I felt so warm and happy and I couldn't help it.

Maybe Ella Smith could fall in love.

I pulled away and gasped for air. "I've never been kissed before, and definitely not like that," I admitted.

He smiled and ran his finger down my jaw line and leaned in again. I didn't freeze rigid for a few seconds like before. I instantly melted into him.

Maybe Ella Smith is in love.


	6. Chapter 6

[6] Six [6]

How long had we been there kissing for? Four or five minutes at the most, surely. But I couldn't escape his sweet lips and his rough tongue as it brushed past my own. He pulled back with a smirk.

"I think you went down to 9% more evil than the others," I said as I gasped for air.

He brushed my cheek with the palm of his hand. "How about we get on with that meringue?" He asked.

I nodded.

It's been a week since I first came to Japan. I haven't done much, Heck I've done no sightseeing and more criminals are falling dead. It really is a bleak escape for me.

Pulling on my socks I hobbled out of my bedroom and into the main lobby – where everyone gathered for meetings about Kira. Like always the screens were monitoring Misa's behaviour that often consisted of painting her toenails and reading girly magazines.

"God does that girl do anything else?" I muttered under my breath as I watched Misa stare intently at her magazine. "Oh wait, she does," I added after seeing Misa get up and switch on the CD player which suddenly blasted 'BIG BANG – MAKE LOVE'. [i] I bet she wants to make love to Light [/i] I thought bitterly.

A pair of arms wrapped around me from behind, "Guess who?"

"Light, don't you care that you've already got Misa?" I asked.

"I'm not with Misa, she's just...there."

L looked at us and raised his eyebrows and Light recoiled and walked away from me. I sighed and sat down next to my brother and pulled my knees up to my chin and wrapped my arms around them.

"You know, I think that we should trick Kira. Say we'll meet up with him, and he'll want to because he'll obviously want you dead, L, and this will be a perfect shot for him – " L looked at me with a 'DO YOU WANT ME DEAD?' face – "L, you don't go of course it'll be too risky, but that way we can see Kira and capture him."

"We've thought about it and if Kira can kill by just seeing a face, we'll be jeopardising someone else's life," Light said.

"And saving millions of other life's in the process," I said.

"And whose life in this task force are you willing to jeopardise exactly?"

"You've got me there. You can't exactly let anyone help in the investigation; they might run away and blab to everyone."

"Although it was actually I really good idea."

"Nah, I was just having an Agatha Christie moment."

"You're cute when you're modest."

I blushed and looked away from his face and to the screen. "Where's Misa gone?" Misa was on none of the monitors and then...we found her...

"EW SHUT THE SCREEN OFF I DON'T WANT TO SEE THAT!"

I turned around, "WHY THE HELL HAVE YOU GOT CAMERA'S IN THE BATHROOM? IS THAT EVEN LEGAL? YOU ALL ARE A BUNCH OF PERVERTS!"

I got up and left the room and headed to Misa's floor. This way there is no chance I'll see her squatting on the toilet. Wait? Do model's even squat? I bet they use fancy language like 'excrete' although that's not that fancy but it does sound politer and more allowable.

I knocked on the door.

"Come in."

The apartment with big and lush. The modern furniture was in soft neutral colours and made Misa's punk outfits stand out a lot. I smiled politely.

"Hi," I said.

She just looked at me and then back at her magazines.

"Do you not like me?" I asked.

She raised an eyebrow, "No. I fear you're stealing my Light."

"I'm not stealing anyone," I said, "You're not even going out from what he told me."

"He's only doing it to stop you from thinking he's Kira, he doesn't love you, he loves me," she replied. Turning a page of her magazine her eyes darted in my direction. "Anyway, you're far too young for Light. He'll never go for someone like you. You don't even look like a girl," she put down her magazine and twisted around so she was facing me, "You might as well forget about Light. He's told me he's only using you to stop you from jeopardising his innocent life. You and your brother both suspect him and he just wants his name cleared. Both of you are ruining mine and Light's life together. It really infuriates me."

"Wow, you can use the word 'infuriate'. Look Misa, Light's not even going out with you, he told me face to face, and you're just being a total bitch," I said, "and maybe Light goes for looks more than brains!" I got up and stormed out the room. To my surprise I passed Light on the way and he looked scary.

Being the fool I am, I decided to follow. He entered Misa's apartment leaving the door ajar a fraction, perfect enough for me to listen to their conversations.

"Oh Light, she was so mean! Why doesn't she just grasp the fact you love me not her."

"I don't know."

"Do you really have to pretend to like her still?"

"I'm sorry Misa, but I think if I didn't her and L would find a way to convict me as Kira," I heard Light say, "Do you really want that Misa?"

I turned and sprinted away my eyes stinging with tears.

That bastard! I'm just like Misa! Stupid enough to get fooled by good looks and charms! GOD ELLA I THOUGHT YOU WAS BETTER THAN THAT!


	7. Chapter 7

[7] Seven [7]

I sat stirring my tea endlessly with the silver spoon – which I used to put sugar in with. I stared absently at the chair across from me and furrowed my eyebrow in thought.

"You seem really absent minded today." I jumped and fell of my seat, spoon in hand, tea fortunately not spilt.

"Where the hell did you come from?" I pulled myself up and stood facing Light. I was blushing slightly but all the feelings of romance were mostly overpowered by anger.

"Well, my mummy and daddy loved each other very much –"

I rolled my eyes, "Not that." Light tilted his head to the side and frowned.

"Has Misa said something to you? You know she's only a jealous little bitch," he said as he stepped closer to me.

I held my spoon out and pointed it at him, "Stand back, I have a spoon and I'm not afraid to use it."

Light laughed, "Still the same Old Ella."

"Are you calling me old now?"

"Ella, you know I don't mean it like that..."

"Do I? What do I really know about you to decide that?" I asked.

"You know me enough to kiss me," he replied.

I frowned, "But that doesn't –" He was suddenly kissing me, with his arm around my hips and one hand holding the back of my head with his fingers weaved into my red hair. I resisted at first but like so many times before I got sunk in and wrapped my arms around his neck. When he pulled back I finished my sentence: "That doesn't count."

"Shame because I actually think we've connected."

"Light, you're not using me are you, to help clear your name?" I asked, looking up at him through my eyelashes.

Light looked at me, shock etched on his face, "Why would I do that? I love you Ella."

I looked at him stunned and found myself believing this bastard. "I don't believe you," I said.

"Let me show you..." He took my hand and took away my spoon and put it in my now cold tea.

He guided me through many corridors I had grew adapt to. And then he stopped at his bedroom door and kissed my hand before opening it up.

"Why have you brought me in here?" I asked.

"Well, I wanted to prove I was not Kira. Don't you think I'd have something suspicious in my room if I was?"

"It is suspicious though, it's too clean," I said. Light laughed at that. "It's just, I heard you telling Misa that you're –"

"Whatever you heard me discuss with Misa is Lies," he answered quickly and sharply, "You know how Misa is. She gets jealous, she's temperamental, she only likes to hear what she wants to hear."

"But how can you explain these weird feelings I've been having?"

"I think it's what the experts call Love," said Light, "I think it's possible that you feel the same way towards me as I do to you."

I looked at my feet, "I'm usually quite smart. I guess I'm just no good at this kind of stuff..."

Light lifted my head by my chin with his index finger and looked me in the eyes, "I love you, which is all you need to know."

He leaned down and kissed me with his hands firmly on the small of my back. He had lifted my top up a little bit so his cold skin chilled my warm skin. I kissed back, slightly unsure about how to react and shuddered as his hands moved further up my top and under my bra. I moaned into his kiss as he cupped them and ran his thumps over my erect nipples. Light smiled and deepened the kiss – whilst gently pushing me onto the bed.

"Er Light? What are we –" He pressed his index finger to my lips and started to kiss my collarbone. Once again, I moaned slightly.

Light was back kissing my lips but this time I was topless and braless. Whilst kissing me Light held my hips and fingered the rim of my jeans and I pushed my socks off with my feet (I'm good at doing that, I can never be bothered to bend down and take them off). Soon I was just left with my knickers on and Light was left in his boxers and soon enough they were left somewhere on the floor. I screamed as Light pushed himself into me but soon enough the pain subsided and it felt quite good...

We were lying on his bed, the quilts covering our naked bodies. Light halfway between sleep and awake. I was left worrying and biting my lip.

"Light?" I asked.

"Yeah."

"Are you Kira?"

"Yeah," He moaned.

I'm not sure if he heard the question properly or not so I prodded him.

"What is it Ella?" He asked as he shifted around to see me.

"Are you telling the truth?" I asked.

"Yes, but I swear if you tell anyone I'll tell them what you did tonight and you'll be sent back home to your mum and she won't even want you," he said, "Plus, I know your name and face, I can kill you now if I want to and If I know you're going to squeal on me."

"All this was just to blackmail me wasn't it; you don't love me do you?"

"It's because I love you."

"I'm not [i] that [/i] stupid," I mumbled.

I grabbed my clothes and got dressed. Light was too deep in sleep to care that I had left him but that didn't concern me. I chased my shadow back to my room and took a shower in tears and water and stood in the sharp cold water for ages, my shoulders shaking as I cried.

I can't wear white on my wedding day now.

I shan't be able to give my virginity to someone I know I love undoubtedly.

I know Light is Kira but unless I find a way of proving it without Light knowing it was me that 'spilt the beans' then I am a dead women. And I want to stay alive a bit longer thank-you-very-much. I just need to work out a strategy and get it in motion.

Light, Kira, whatever you'd like to call him, is going down...


	8. Chapter 8

[8] Eight [8]

Life is so transient and unpredictable. Apparently that's why it's so beautiful. But not everything about life is beautiful. Honestly, Life is a plain game with only temporary chapters of excitement. The rest seems like torture or is plain boring. Life is also cruel, it through things at you and forgets to tell you to duck. But this is the path of life we must take, we must learn, we must sacrifice, we must live through the dull days, and struggle through the torture and most of all, we must make the most of what we have. Nevertheless, it doesn't stop me from moping about, I know I must grasp what's in front of me with a tight fist, but what I'm grabbing is like air and it makes me feel sick and queasy and I have no idea on what I have to do next. It's like a game with no instructions and I've just reached the hard levels.

I stayed in bed for nearly a day. I didn't even bother reading Sherlock Holmes or Agatha Christie. I couldn't even be bothered for sugar. Honestly, I felt dead.

Knocking came at the door and it persisted until I told the person knocking to come in.

"Hey L," I said as I snuggled deeper into my mass of quilts.

"Hey Ella, are you okay you seem down lately?"

"I'm not feeling very well," I admitted, "I kind of miss home, my little brother in particular."

L nodded and perched himself on the end of my bed. "I wondered if you wanted to come out today," he said, "I was going to take you to my favourite cake shop and then my favourite ice cream parlour."

I bolted up, "You mean we get to look around Japan?"

"Yeah, when you put it that way, and we don't even need Watari to chauffer us," he said, "I'm going to drive us."

"Do you even have a licence?"

He looked up and stayed quiet for a minute, "Yes, of course I do."

"Why did you have to think about it?"

L smiled, "We could get a Taxi."

"Fine, but I don't have any Yen, only English pounds and notes."

"That's okay, I've got plenty."

"Let me go get ready then!"

Meaning I was going out I decided to dress up a bit. I put on my purple skinny jeans and my white v-neck with 'Geeks will inherit the earth' on it and styled it with a black and purple neck-chief and a black studded belt. After pulling on my socks and boots I walked out of my bedroom to L – who was waiting outside. I smiled, "Let's go then."

Japan is big, let me tell you that and the shops are amazing and I could have got lost and surprise, surprise, I'm the only natural redhead.

I spent most of the time in a book shop looking at murder novels and even found an English copy of an Anne Rice book: "Interview with the vampire". Obviously I had to read it and L happily paid for it.

"So, is this what you do when you get any free time?" I asked L as I popped my spoon of ice cream in my mouth. I had had an ice cream sundae, with chocolate, vanilla and strawberry ice cream, marshmallows, nuts and gummy bears on top with a wafer.

"When I have free time."

"So you don't get out much?"

"I don't like getting out much, too many people could be Kira and if Kira can kill with just a face I'm in grave danger stepping out into the outside world."

"Sorry for putting you in danger L."

"No problem Ella," he said taking a bite of his chocolate flake.

After a long and awkward silence L finally spoke up: "Do you like Light?"

I looked up my mouth agape, my thoughts mixed.

L raised his hand, "No, don't answer, of course you like him."

"What brought this up?" I finally asked.

"I was just curious, I wanted to see how you'd react," admitted L, "You act like Light when you're asked questions that you know the truth to but lie about. You know, I really do think Light is Kira."

"Oh, is that so." Because your hunch is absolutely and completely correct.

"Yeah, I've got no prove yet, but I know it's him."

"You need someone you can trust to try and squeeze it out of him, the truth I mean."

"Yes, someone like you."

"I can't."

"But you could."

Yes, I could and maybe this way I could get Light locked away and not end up dead, gone, forever absent from this world. I could if my whole body didn't decide to jolt with emotions and endlessly make me feel like a lovesick puppy and all conclude with the fact that: I'm in love with him and he's using me. But now the tables have turned and now I could possibly use him, use him and bring justice to the world.

"I could, and I will if you want me to," I said whilst putting the last bit of ice cream into my mouth, "But you've got to buy me a strawberry cheesecake."

"Thanks, I'm glad I met you little sis'."

"Course you are."

I don't actually know why I agreed, I don't even know if I could stand being in the presence of Light but it's also a great chance to be near him. I love him but I want him to be brought to justice. I love him enough to want him to get locked away to stop killing. Because every time he kills he becomes more impure and I don't want that. Actually, I never wanted this, I never wanted love. But here I am. A fool. A fool in love.

Light is not Justice.

L is not Justice.

_I_ am Justice!


	9. Chapter 9

[9] Nine [9]

I knocked on Lights door and waited outside for approximately ten seconds before he answered it. Instantaneously I pounced on him, pushing him back and passionately. This was business not pleasure. But it sure was pleasurable even if he was Kira.

I pulled away and smiled coyly.

"I thought you were avoiding me?" He said. Is this boy a robot? At the moment he's emotionless.

"No, I've just decided that I love you," I said.

"I don't think you do," he said, "I think you're using me."

"Then I guess we're fair," I said.

"You do realise I can kill you this instant if I want to? Don't you?"

"You do realise that I intend to catch you before you kill me? Don't you?" I mocked, "This is a game, Light, a game of cat and mouse and it's just started."

"I think I'm winning."

"That's what you think," I winked at him.

Light laughed, "I like the new you. I think I'm falling in love with it."

I kissed his lips, "I fell in love with you a long time ago."

He pushed me down and rolled on top of me, "So what am I? The cat?"

"No, you're definitely the mouse."

"The mouse always wins though."

"Yeah, but this time the cats not going to waste all nine of its lives."

"You better land on your feet then."

"Oh I intend to."

I placed my hands against his chest and pushed him back forcefully so he went flying off me. I got up and brushed down my hands. "When I was little I was forced to make friends. I took part in many clubs against my will. I'm a master at martial-arts. Amazing at kung-fu. Exhilarating at taekwondo. Oh, and I'm not half bad at the waltz and tango."

Light raised an eyebrow, "You dance?"

"Yes, do you?"

"I took lessons in tango," he admitted, "I went with my mum and little sister."

"It's a date then, you and I show of our tango moves, and you can pick the music. To be honest I need to brush up on my steps," I winked at him, "Prepare to fail."

Light smirked and said: "I have no desire to fail. Oh, and you need to wear a skirt."

"That can be arranged, see you tonight, Light."

"7 'o' clock, it's a date."

I walked away with my head held high and a smile dancing on my lips.

I straightened my hair that night and then pulled it up into a side bun. And applied make-up with really dark and seductive ruby red lipstick and Smokey eyes (I had also applied foundation to hide the bags).

For clothing I put on a red skirt and a white low-cut blouse, and then I grabbed a pair of red flats. I styled my outfit with gold bangles and a necklace.

I was ready to dance and surprise the heck out of Light.

Light walked into the hall I was waiting in and had cleared with the help of L (he decided he was going to stay and watch though). His eyes widened a little when he took me in and then his lips turned at the corners into a smile. He walked over to me in his suit and handed me a red rose, "I thought it would set the mood", he said.

"The music?"

"Oh damn, I forgot, we can't dance after all."

"Ha, you're not getting out of it that easily," I smirked, "L, get Watari to turn down the lights and switch on the music."

Light nodded and typed into his laptop in the epic way that is his and his alone.

The lights dimmed and the music played.

"Rondo, ON/OFF, good choice," He mused.

And the dancing began.

The dance was a flurry of passion as we strutted towards each other and danced in sharp staccato movements. He swooped me low and I brushed my lips against his cheeks, guiltily, more than once. Often we'd do a quick foot flick or a sharp head snap and then he'd spin me around and catch me as I fell backwards with my foot pointed in the air. It was a counter clockwise flow of movement and we took control of most of the dance floor. I glanced at Lights serene face and he saw me and tripped up but casually picked himself back up and found the beat again. Tango is a dance where the whole regime is to be passionate and demanding and extremely seductive so I kept myself close to Light and often pulled myself away to get caught again. Tango has a dramatic nature that catches the watchers breath and should lead up to an applause as the song falls to an end. Light swooped me down and we pulled apart at the end waiting for a minute or two.

"Well that was fun," I gasped, as I walked to L – who handed me a bottle of water. I chugged it down and handed the last drop to Light. I heard him mumble: "That's hardly fair." Causing me to smirk.

"Tomorrow we master the foxtrot," I said.

"What? I don't even know that one!" Complained Light, then it struck him: "Neither do you!"

"Ha! Blonde much?"

Afterwards I followed Light to his room and locked the door behind us.

"I won," I smirked.

"You cheated."

"I'm the cat; I'm meant to be cunning, although you're the mouse and you're less than agile."

"That's what you think," he said. He placed his hands on my hips and kissed me, "I don't know why I don't kill you now."

"Because you want to win this game of cat and mouse, fairly."

He smiled, "And because life would be boring with just Misa as company."

"Yeah, I think I'd die if I had to read 'cosmo' everyday and paint my nails." I pulled a face and Light laughed.

"You know, she tried to give L a makeover once."

"That I'd love to see."

"You know what I'd love to see?" Asked Light.

"What?"

"You naked in bed with me."

I tilted my head to the side and bit my lip, "That could be arranged."


	10. Chapter 10

[10] Ten [10]

I woke up in bed next to Light. One of his arms was draped across my waist and his head was buried into the crook of my neck. I could feel his soft breath and it tickled me with every tiny exhale Light gave. I sighed and fidgeted so I was slightly more comfortable and I dozed off again...

"Ella wake up."

"One more minute Light," I groaned. But he wasn't having that. He rolled me over and held me down.

"I told you to wake up," he said playfully. He bent down and blew a raspberry on my stomach; I squealed and kicked him away. He hit his chest where my foot had impacted with it, "Ouch that hurt!" He then started to tickle my ribs.

"Stop!" I begged.

"No way in hell, this is payback," he replied.

In pulled his hands back and looked at me with his head tilted at an angle.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Oh nothing, I just thought you'd want to know how I do it."

"Do what?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Kill."

"Oh that," I waved my hand, "I'll ask once I chuck you into prison."

"Bitch," he muttered.

"Murderous bastard," I retorted.

"I love our relationship," he admitted whilst bending down to nibble my collar bone, "You could never get bored of it."

"Damn right," I laughed. I started to stare at my hands and then quietly asked: "So, how do you kill them?"

"You'll just have to find out."

"Damn, Agatha Christie is more fun then you," I muttered.

I got dressed in blue skinny-jeans today and a red tank top and then pulled on black socks. After much hesitation, I put on a multi-coloured scarf- which mum brought me, thinking it would make me look less morbid without turning me into a girly-girl I love to hate.

I walked out my room to instantly bump into Light.

"You look pretty."

"You're a stalker."

"Okay then. But you have to allow me to escort you to the main hall," he said sticking out a arm.

With an eye roll I took it, "But only because you asked so nicely."

We walked in to see the men there – as per usual – sipping coffee and listening to L's theories. L looked up and his eyes turned violently towards Light. "Ella, Light, so nice you could join us," he said sharply, "Whilst you two have been away we've been working ferociously trying to solve the Kira case. I took it the two of you were together." I rolled my eyes and pulled up a chair and sat down.

After an hour or more I grew tired of the pointless conclusions...

"I think we should go ahead with a 'make a bargain with Kira and meet up' kind-of plan," I said – whilst stealing one of L's sugar cubes and popping it in my mouth – "But I take it your all a bunch of pansies that don't want to throw your life on the line."

"What if Kira doesn't oblige?" asked Light.

"He will, from what you guys say, Kira is that type of guy – or girl – look, I'm just fed up that you're all chasing you tails around and getting nowhere when it's all so obvious" – I threw my hands up in the air – "Kira is smart. If you put CV cameras all around his house he'll find a way past it and from what I understand you only put CV cameras in two houses. One being Light's. You'll are stupid, surely you can see that Light is a genius. A genius who could bypass the cameras. A genius that could be Kira."

Light shot a murderous look in my direction.

"You're missing quite a few facts," said one of the investigators.

"Who needs facts? When a man's life is on the line he'll confess his deepest and darkest sins!"

"But Kira will be strong enough to hold his tongue."

"I don't care what you guys do, I'll investigate myself, even if I have to die – " I glanced at Light – "as long as I catch him before he kills me, I'm alright."

"You're playing a dangerous game Ella," said Light.

"Aw and just when I thought you was starting to like me."

Light scoffed, "Says you. You want to get me arrested!"

I get up from the chair, "Why don't you confess to everyone Light."

"But I'm not Kira!"

"And that's what she said," I muttered. I turned sharply to face him, "I'll see you later okay? Love you."

I turned back around to hear him say: "L, your sister is giving out really messed up mixed signals."

Because I love him, because I want to make love to him and I don't want to see his hands stained in blood. Because I know and I want the others to think I'm in the same position as L. Because I am Justice and I am in love with a murderer. Most of all, because Light is the one I love to hate the most.


End file.
